Another Rebel Falls to Love

I began my final pep talk to my performing arts high school freshman with, “I’m so proud of you all. You deserve a hand for being –”

“You don’t know where my hand has been,” Alex cuts me off.

I glance around the room at the other students. But the positive culture of the group holds strong. The other students resist the eye rolls, the squinted looks his way and the “Alex!” that they often hiss under their breath at the beginning of the year. We had a rough start in August, where students would openly yell out their frustration with Alex’s attention problems and inability to keep his mouth shut during sincere moments.

I continue with as little pause as I can, “–for being a class who cares about each other, and is learning how to work as a group.  And we continue to be strong, supporting each others differences and Alex, please try not to call out – we know you struggle with that and we love you through it.” I only use the word “struggle” publicly because Alex used it himself in a former circle/quote/discussion where he opened up to us and shared the hard things in his life.

The one thing rebels can get behind and albeit not perfectly, end up conforming to? The love of his peers.

How do you create a strong culture in arts educational settings? How do you shift the group mindset from judgment to love? How do you create tolerance within a group for the flaws in others. How do you establish a safe place to air grievances and take risks artistically when your students are fourteen?

I used to think all it took were theatre games. Then I saw the new Heineken commercial this weekend and I was reminded that I also use an additional technique when building culture with public arts high school students. I’ve started every class for six years the same way whether it’s Theatre History, Acting for Dancers, Voice and Speech, or Intro to Theatre. We sit in a circle and respond to a quote through writing, followed by discussion.

The day is long for urban arts high school kids. In Chicago it was 8am-5pm daily. In LA it is 8am-4pm daily. Some of them wake up well before dawn to take public transportation and help siblings before they get themselves ready. The quote I choose for the day is something that has to do with our learning objective, the play we’re reading, or the political climate of the moment. Teenagers spend more time on social media than the rest of the population and they’re getting confusing messages from sources that are often untrue. They’re also in a constant state of fear that an awkward moment in school could follow them home that evening because someone could post online. Conflicts get blown out of proportion on email/facebook/text/snapchat. Nowhere is there space to actually TALK to each other to resolve conflict. Face to face. And I realized last year that nobody is teaching this skill either.

Theatre games allow students to play together and to break down the walls they have up. But these games must coincide with a space to find their own personal voice. Many of the quotes I use to open class are powerful, and students are finding they have an opinion for the first time and they’re stating it publicly. 

There are rules about conflicting views when we sit in the circle and discuss a quote. One is that we agree to disagree and that whatever is said in the circle doesn’t keep us from playing together ten minutes later. Also, I rarely tell them how I personally interpret a quote, I only listen. I don’t want them to please the teacher, I want them to listen to each other. Another rule is that they can be vulnerable and share something of themself. Crying and feelings are what give them power and make them strong and passionate, not weak. And we will hold space for this, though we will not wallow in it unnecessarily because this is not a therapy circle, it’s a thought circle. Another rule is that you can’t vocally “agree” even if it’s positive. When a student responds with an “Oh my gosh, yes!” to someone, the speaker can loose their train of thought and the focus is stolen by the commenter.

In these circles I’ve had moments of breakthrough with groups – where they voice concerns and figure out their conflict all on their own while I keep the flow and fairness in check. I’m always stunned that until they get to my afternoon arts class, nobody has had a group chat with them about serious information in the news concerning politics or racism. I often give them the space for this. Another rule is that circle quote discussions have a time limit unless on rare occasion someone like Trump becomes president and we’re so worried that we need the full class period to talk.

The recent released Heineken commercial shows three pairs of people with opposing views having to go through a series of challengers. First they have to build chairs together, then answer questions about themselves, and finally put together a bar that’s in pieces on the floor. Once all three tasks are complete, they are shown each other’s opposing views on a TV and are given the choice to sit and have a beer to talk about their differences, or walk away. They all choose to sit together because they’ve “played” in the building together and they’ve “talked” with understanding in the questions. We’ve been doing both in my class for years, and I believe this is why the group lifts up Alex on this day before our performance. They’ve chosen ignore his distracting behavior with love and then praise his monologue he’s worked hard to be sincere with.

I have dealt with many arts classes where one to three outliers threaten to disrupt the positive group growth and culture. There are times when I haven’t been successful in creating a positive space. I’ve learned from those times. I’ve learned the kids watch ME very closely when I need to deal with a disruption. I’ve learned that if I not only model behavior that corrects in love and patience, and we also talk about it openly, the group mirrors me.

It’s emotional when they begin to do this. It’s transformative. Kids like Alex may not change a whole lot, but you begin to see that they feel safe because they can’t resist giving in to the feeling that the group cares. The greatest change is in the group, not Alex. They know that making the effort to love is harder and takes more patience, but it unifies them. And last weekend when the freshman class at LACHSA (The LA County HS for the Arts) had their final performance project, they blew people away. Their unity brought out the talent in each of them. The safety they had created among each other allowed them each to take risks in character creation and connection – some going funnier than we’d ever imagined, and some, like Alex’s scene, going more dramatic and focused than we’d ever seen. This class has been the talk of the town for the last eight days. Many people, including parents, teachers and our department chair, have attributed this to their talent and my writing (I wrote all their pieces this year). These are true in part, but I know the real reason this class  stands out. They’ve realized how to unite and care about each other regardless of their differences and annoying habits. It’s beautiful. It’s awe-inspiring. And I wish our world could also have a circle quote discussion and play some theatre games every day. I think all the wars and the hate would start to drain away.